Are you ready to go to the next level?

Two strangers walk into a workshop.

Both were natural therapists looking for similar outcomes but nervous as all get out. They had never met before but by “co-incidence” managed to sit beside each other.

As it turned out both these women did have something in common. They had both seen me speak at their industry associations in 2007.

I hadn’t heard from either of them in nearly three years but they were here today because their message had got bigger than their fear of public speaking.

Despite their own reservations, they were ready to find out if they were “good enough” to speak from the front of a room.

I quizzed them as to what it was that they remembered most from the talk I delivered to their respective associations. Both immediately came back with a vague recollection of a couple of things I had taught them during that brief 60 minute talk.

However both cited the reason they were sitting in the chairs, about to take themselves to hell and back, was because they remembered my story. They felt they knew me from that story and they trusted me to help them.

Both talks had caused me extreme discomfort but this short exchange showed the reality of speaking your truth. I felt honoured by their trust but I also honoured and thanked myself for having the guts to go and speak to them all those years back.

The talks these women attended were “walk in and talk” events both delivered in bleak environments. One in particular I remember being VERY nervous at because no one had mentioned my talk would be videoed. I’d driven for two hours that Sunday morning telling myself the worst that could happen was that I’d only bomb in front of a few people. The video going out to their national membership upped the odds dramatically!

The other talk had been delivered during the worst weather Melbourne could conjure up. I was tired and weary because I’d had to leave home three hours early because three out of the four exit arteries around my town were closed due to snow blocking the roads. The journey normally takes around three hours. It took me six hours this day as I progressively drove through snow, gale force winds and driving rain.

Despite these not so harmonious circumstances I made an impact on both occasions not because I was good but because the story I told resonated deeply.

It wasn’t a fancy story. In fact it was a rock bottom story without a happy ending.

It was however my truth.

These two women remembered me and my story enough to pay to attend one of my workshops three years later. Not only that, they chose to turn up to a workshop and let an almost total stranger help them overcome a fear most would rather die than do.

Back then I knew nothing about method. I hadn’t been taught how to work the energy of a stage. I didn’t know how to adequately roll out a learning set. I didn’t know how to put knowledge into conceptual bites that make it easy for people to understand. I probably broke all the rules at both talks but still my message came through because I knew how to earn the right to be in the room.

A well crafted “earn the right” makes you credible and memorable no matter what is going on because it demands you speak at the intersection of love and truth.

I influenced those women not because I was some fast eddy with slick sales techniques. I impressed because I had experienced and lived through every wart, every crinkle, every tear and every emotion I spoke about.

The power of emotional speaking is that it builds relationships.

Once you learn how to harness the emotion and tell your story from your heart, people will not only sit through a sixty minute talk without throwing tomatoes, they also remember you years later. This alone is marketing gold. BUT it gets seriously golden when people will come and work with you without you having to evoke hard sell marketing techniques to get them there.

Sure it’s not the fast road to success but it’s powerful, it’s genuine and it’s real.

The course they attended last weekend was called Sore to SOAR and man did everyone soar. One participant contacted me this week to tell me she has sent away for the material she needs to run her first workshop. She has been meaning to do it for ages. Difference this week is that she has done it.

But I get this feedback all the time. It is awesome and I love hearing every word.

However there is something more important for me than seeing participants float from the room espousing how much they’ve grown and how good they feel. What is truly remarkable is the undeniable fact that 80% of the participants who have attended fully have either spoken in public or delivered their own workshops within two months of completing Sore to SOAR.

That’s my point of difference – people actually step up and step out, some within weeks of attending the course.

The people who have done the course are just everyday people who have a dream in their heart and a burning desire to help more people.

Many who are breaking through are busy Mum’s, people just setting up in practice or people who have already had success in one aspect of their practice. To date they have been a bit “scaredy cat” about the next step but are good to go now.

They are the unseen heroes who have been standing beside a massage table treating people one on one or sitting at home knowing something is growing within them. Knowing their message is important for the world but they have no idea what that message is, how to find it or how to get that message out or even where to start. This eventually causes discomfort.

Discomfort is the one thing that makes most humans move.

What’s weird is that these supposedly “ordinary” people already have the story within them that will gain them recognition and give them the confidence to leap up to the next level. Sore to SOAR allows them to connect with their story and we all have one. The true magic occurs when you learn to apply the “earn the right” formula to your story.

Sore to SOAR is not just another workshop it’s a personal expansion.

The two strangers left with an admiration for each other rarely forged in a weekend. One shared as she walked out the door that she felt she finally had all she needed to speak. It was an incredible honour to move her from feeling ordinary to extraordinary in such a short period of time.

Sore to SOAR gives people two ultimate gifts – confidence and no excuses.

If you are ready to go to the next level there is a Sore to SOAR intensive workshop running in Melbourne 26 and 27 June 2010.

Sore to SOAR takes you on a journey from a sore place of really hurting inside to one where you SOAR out the door on Sunday evening with a heap more clarity around what you do and how you can make a difference to a lot more people.

The early bird price is running out soon.

Book now: www.Sore-to-SOAR.com

Are You Addicted to Fear?

I had a big aha moment last week when a well loved client had her inner wimp out tap dancing on the table.

As the wimp tapped loudly she made a lot of noise but was really only treading the same old boards out of habit.

I realised just like drugs, alcohol and anything else toxic that become a negative due to overuse, habits often cover fear. This creates a vicious circle because our egos love fear. Above all our ego hates change. This gives our ego a vested interest in keeping us dancing on the spot.

Fear and ego are a formidable force and continue to provide rational reasons not to do things.

Once addicted our fear and ego begins to dominate our destiny.

Eventually we overuse fear to the point of addiction.

Not such a bad thing if the behaviour we get addicted to is positive because initially that at least creates forward movement. But when the behaviour is negative it results in a downward spiral.

Unless we create some sort of intervention program, the problem only becomes worse.

You know you are addicted to fear if you:

* Are not moving forward

* Under charging

* Over giving

* Feeling frustrated that things aren’t working out for you

* Know your actions (or lack of them) are limiting your potential

* Start believing the excuses you create to cover your actions or inactions

* Listen to your negative voice instead of ignoring it

* Have a great message or service that isn’t getting to enough people

FEAR is the root cause of all these points and this is the short list. There are a thousand things we are addicted to that hold us back.

However I believe the fear list can be distilled down to seven core items

1. Fear of failure

2. Fear of success

3. Fear of being judged

4. Fear of getting out of your comfort zone.

5. Fear of not being good enough

6. Fear of getting the things you actually want

7. Fear of your own greatness and light

All these fears are driven by internal voices that frankly just churn out a bunch of lies about you 24/7.

Call the voices whatever you like – the monkey voice - inner wimp – inner vandal – inner critic – inner “holding you back from being who you really are” hooligan ……. there are a thousand “inners” who stop us in our tracks.

After a while though the voices become comfortable friends that give us an excuse for not accomplishing all the things we want to do. Once that happens, your fear is now an addiction.

Addiction comes in many forms and there are many theories, including 12 step programs that assist people to break through their addiction.

I know for myself I attended a Debtors Anonymous meeting and experienced the full hit of facing myself head on in a 12 Step program. As I spoke the words “I’m Margaret and I have a problem with debt”…..and heard the response back “Hi Margaret” …. I knew I had gone too far.

My problem came because I set out on a crazy journey of self discovery, following a dream that was probably best left in the “do with more resources” pile. I didn’t start out with the right knowledge to go from a salary earner to someone who had to sell themselves to make a living. By the time I got the right knowledge I was way out of control and was addicted to maxing out credit cards.

I knew that I had to overcome the addiction because it was holding me back.

My first step was to recognise I had a problem and then I had to look at the root cause because the debt was only a symptom. The real truth of the problem was that I was addicted to expensive personal development workshops. I kept going to them to get validation and they kept selling me another course. I had found the source of the problem. An out of control positive habit and the fear of not being good enough.

The hard core reality check that meeting gave me sent me cold turkey and made me accept I had just been repeating my old “not good enough” inner talk. Once I got that I understood I could at least stop the debt growing by accepting that I didn’t need others to tell me I was worthy of personal and business success.

It was time to set up my own courses and start teaching and silence that vicious inner wimp that was keeping me from helping others.

Now if I attend a course I ask three golden questions:

1. Is this educating a weakness or a strength?

2. Will I come out with a tangible skill

3. Are my guts churning? If they are, I know I’m facing a fear.

If not, then I have probably learnt the information already and haven’t been brave enough to put the knowledge into action, or my ego is keeping me in line.

Either way I take an action that will pull me into discomfort because I know that’s where the growth is. I have found facing fear in this manner and walking straight through it clears the fear. But you have to keep facing your fear long term.

Good learning will make your guts churn because it puts you outside your comfort zone where you don’t know the answers. It will also place you with people who challenge and inspire you, not people who are churning out what you want to hear and making you feel all warm and fuzzy.

I was told at one of those fancy PD events, “Margaret once isn’t good enough - you need to climb a mountain of fear every day”. I had just exhausted myself overcoming the very real fear of climbing a very real mountain in a snow storm where at one point slipping on the ice and falling to your death down a ravine was a very real possibility.

There will always be another mountain of fear and that day I got to the top by taking one small step at a time. I knew if I stopped I would give up. I didn’t take breaks with the others I just kept going. I’ve found taking action certainly helps keep the wimp in line and the mountain climbable. Even in a snow storm I eventually blitzed my fear and the ego that said I couldn’t do it.

So if you are like me and you like to take action and walk through your fears then maybe I have a deal for you.

The greatest fear most people have is to speak in public.

The greatest business and personal growth building skill you can acquire is to speak in public.

I’ve also faced the fear of speaking in one hit.

I was a total wimp but knew I had to master public speaking to get my message out to more people. So my first public speaking appearance was to a roomful of my coaching peers. I just went and did it with no training. As it turned out I broke every “rule” in the book that fateful night but they loved me none the less and I’ve never looked back.

Now I help others get over the fear of speaking and I find the type of people who turn up to my Sore to SOAR speaking intensive are “just do it” wimps.

They are as scared as I was that night I spoke to my colleagues. But deep in their hearts they know they have to take a leap of faith because, like me, they figured out:

“You speak when getting your message out becomes more important than your fear”

Once you walk through a fear you realise there is nothing on the other side.

Once you speak you realise you have a tool that will give you everything on the other side along with the personal recognition you so deeply desire.

Sore to SOAR asks you to tell your personal story to six workshop participants.

Its like me speaking to coaches – it’s a safe audience because they understand how you feel. You can’t fail because you know your story backwards and the others in the group give you the encouragement to voice it.

The really interesting thing for me is that many of the natural therapists who attend the course have been drug and alcohol addicts in the past or have endured and overcome more physical and emotional abuse than most humans need to.

They turned to alternative therapies to heal their wounds and then went on to train in the modality that helped them. When you learn how to put your story into a compelling format - your story becomes your glory - and people start to understand why they need to work with you.

To date about 80% of the Sore to SOAR participants after finishing the course have either spoken to groups or set up their own small workshops and have started to stand in their own power. These are extraordinary results because most people leave workshops with great intent but fail to implement the knowledge or like me end up in courses that don’t make you take action.

My 12 step experience made me swear to create programs that really drive people do what they sign up for at least once. I think the difference with Sore to SOAR is simply that you go cold turkey. You face the fear in front of your peers and once you have mastered speaking, which is the one thing most people would rather do than die, you just go ‘pah’ and get on with it.

The effect speaking has on a small business is remarkable because it gives you opportunity to get in front of more people, you become an inspiration to others for your braveness and it opens new doors.

If you have a message inside you that is burring to get out – I’d love to help you banish your “inners” and finally feel “heard” not just in your business but in every level of your life.

The next Sore to SOAR Speaking Intensive is 26-27 June 2010 in Melbourne. It’s limited to six people. It sells out fast. Book NOW www.SoreToSoar.com

Do you want to be a chocolate, cheese and freedom mouse?

There has been a bout of pull-out-it-is in my practice the last few weeks. 

We often don’t notice trends until they start happening more regularly and the time frame between incidents start to shorten.

I’ve had two clients wanting to pull out of sessions this week and a bout of pull-out-it-is a few weeks ago on workshops. Too many to ignore and enough to call a trend. 

So I sat down to figure out what was causing this because if I’m getting it there

a) a message for me

b) a message my people (that’s you) can learn from

I think I’ve finally sussed it out. 

It’s the new energy asking us to step up to new levels.

This month for the first time I taught Masters. It was one of my most joyous teaching experiences. However, my biggest learning from the weekend was that my pot cupboards had to get rearranged. The current set up was a logistical nightmare but on a higher level I was being called to step up and get ALL my small details sorted. 

As you know once you start moving one thing – everything needs to change and I now have a very practical purpose designed new desk (not the folding barbeque table a friend gave me eight years ago when I literally had no money to buy anything). I also have new storage shelves in the admin office and am fighting the good fight with the resident mouse before the pot cupboard can get sorted.

The mice are of course part of my lesson. You know when you get small irritating things turning up in your life – you need to take care of the small things = DUH moment!

I bought this fancy “mice device” that humanly traps the mouse and then you take him somewhere safe and set him free. This thing is the Rolls Royce of mouse catchers at $25. I have released one little mouse and left him with 4 organic almonds and a piece of cheese to help him on his journey.

His buddy though is proving more elusive. The treats are getting more extravagant in the “mice device” and now include aged cheddar and chocolate ….BUT he’s not having a bar of that and is still pooping all over the kitchen.

I’ve just had a break point where I stood in the kitchen shouting – “it’s the chocolate, the cheese and freedom OR it’s the cheese in the old fashioned trap – YOUR CHOICE BUDDY!”

All the people who have been wanting to pull out of coaching sessions or workshops have all had good excuses. They haven’t done their homework, they have been sick, busy, had kid stuff on, had conflicting appointments, were down for no reason blah blah blah on went the excuses.

Bless them they made me step up and write back and give them a kick up the butt and remind them that the magic occurs in the dark times and in the hard places. These are the times the coaching will really work for them.

Yes, as a coach its great when the client turns up and it’s all love and light and everything is perfect. BUT I know for a fact that my very best learning experiences have come when I’ve showed up in those times when I didn’t feel great and in some instances when I really “should” have stayed at home. It’s the same for clients and workshop attendees – they get the best results if they have suffered a bit to show up.

I was to be seen at an event in Colorado passed out on the floor at the back from jetlag and exhaustion – but would I go to my room for a nana nap. NO because I knew I would still be in the energy of that room and picking something up.

The new energy we are moving into is bringing challenge and change with it. What I’m noticing is that it is challenging at the really basic levels, like cleaning up the pot cupboards. It is also asking us to show up in the hard places and deal with our dark side – those icky yucky horrible emotions and fears that we would rather not deal with.

Here is the segue to the mouse, the cheese and chocolate – you knew it was coming :-)

In the end the winners will be the ones who run into the arms of the people who are there to help them and care enough to have the humane trap lined with cheese and chocolate. 

They are the ones who are prepared to stand up, own their past mistakes, be seen as they truly are and be rewarded with freedom at the end of a scary experience.

However, those who keep pooping in the corner, not showing themselves fully to everyone around them and thinking they can live in an old paradigm will perish. Staying in your safe little hiding places where no one can find you will annoy someone to the point where they simply close the door on your behaviour.

You and your practice are the same. If you continue to hide behind your fears and lack of confidence, refusing to accept your greatness, in the end people are going to get sick of you and will just wipe you out of their life.

I also had someone step up to one of my high end programs today. She came onto the call stating she was sitting on the fence and she was sick of it. I reminded her that people who sit on the fence waiting for the right time to make their move will end up with one thing – pickets up their bum!

I’m really starting to understand this new energy demands us to go to the next level or get off the fence. Yes I know how hard it is to face who you really are. I’ve gone from the wimpy quiet and reserved beige girl in the corner (that no one ever noticed) to someone who is really out there now. It’s not easy and it takes a lot of nuts and guts but the rewards when they come are HUGE in every sense.

All I did to change my reality was to make a choice to change and I learnt from people who had taken a similar road to one I wanted to travel. I kept showing up even when I didn't want to. I took their advice and I took the actions they recommended. That's all.

Maybe its time for you to figure out which mouse you are. The one choosing to show up fully in the humane trap with the chocolate and the cheese or are you content to continue scurrying around the edges, hiding and setting yourself up for a nasty big bang.

This was just going to be a quick reminder for those interested in learning to teach teleclasses but it has turned into a great article with nothing to do with teleclasses. 

BUT if you want to be a chocolate and cheese mouse and run into the arms of someone who will help you step up and learn a new skill that will add another revenue stream to your business on your terms – check it out here